Writers - Desperate, Wretched and Drunk

It's a known fact that great writers are more appreciated after they pass on into the ether. The problem, as I see it, is that people want the writing, but not the writer. But I digress. I'm posting excerpts from articles written by drunk or loony writers. These articles are about drunk or loony writers. And I'm a drunk and loony writer. So if you're not a drunk or loony writer, it's probably best to quit while you're ahead.

Glenn F. Bunting, writing for CalenderLive.com, has an excellent piece on Clive Cussler, who had wide discretion over the movie script for his novel "Sahara." Now, after many costly revisions, he's suing over what did hit the screen. The best line? "I've worked with a lot of live authors," Hart testified. "The dead ones are easier to deal with."

NPR has an even better history lesson featuring drunk writers titled "Great American Writers and Their Cocktails". Money quote? "Alcohol is like love," he said. "The first kiss is magic, the second is intimate, the third is routine. After that you take the girl's clothes off." - Raymond Chandler, as quoted in NPR

"They’re generally a desperate, upset bunch, writers. Stephen Kings and Danielle Steeles aside, the overwhelming majority of them do not earn their living from writing alone. Most have to teach or work at day jobs they despise, take journalism assignments they have no feeling for, or write copy for the back of DVD or cereal boxes" - Writers on film: Drunk, crazy and sexy - By Dave White, writing for Slate

"Crack out the violins. Proffer those hankies. I am now going to discuss why, by and large, writers are treated like scum. (Of course, you could argue that it's because writers are scum, but you have to get your own column to do that.)" - PeterDavid.net

"One little known thing about the legendary drunk writers of the world is that they did most of their writing while stone-cold sober. Hunter S. Thompson wrote Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas on the straight and narrow (I know someone who wanted to go to a Hunter S. Thompson reading just to heckle the author; personally, I think that heckling someone who owns more than 20-30 firearms is a bit, perhaps, unwise). The problem with writing under the influence is that it makes it very difficult to concentrate on what you want to say. Or even remember what you want to say" - Upon Silence, PaulFrankenstein.org

"Friends, it is time to get drunk and type. NaDruWriNi - National Drunk Writing Night. Best goddamn idea I’ve heard in a while. I mean, commemorating it is a good idea. I’m not saying you need an excuse to drink and write. I’m not saying I need one, anyway...There is a big difference between a writer who drinks and a drunk who writes..." - Byrneunit.com

"In 1994 I started writing a novel. By this I mean I created a word document named 'My Novel', hit save and then got drunk with friends. The next day, terrified as I was to return, I created a second document, called 'My Novel - notes'. And in there I wrote down every idea that came to me about what might be in the novel. Only had one at first (“The narrator gets drunk. And then…well…hmmm")..." - Writing hacks (hacks for writing) - Part 1: Starting, By Scott Berkun, Scottberkun.com

"Fortunately for you, fat and drunk are practically two prerequisites for writing success. The difference between Ernest Hemingway and you is that he used his limited hours of coherency to write classic American fiction, while you spend your time touching yourself and ogling the showcase models on The Price is Right.
So, get your hands off the goodies and onto the keyboard, and you'll be on your way to lasting fame and a violent death by your own hand, just what every writer wishes for!" - John Warner, Mcsweeneys.net

And can we forget the all-knowing wikipedia? Has an excellent collection of "Iconic Drinkers" and their quotes. "In an appraisal of Lowry's masterpiece Under the Volcano, British novelist Martin Amis comments that, "To make a real success of being an alcoholic you need to be...shifty, unfastidious, solopsistic, insecure and indefatigable. Lowry was additionally equipped with an extra-small penis, which really seemed to help". - Wikipedia"

Ok. Nuff said. If you're not drunk, now would be a good time to hit the bottle.